The Little Redhaired Girl

The Truman!

2011-05-17T20:59:00.000-07:00

This is where we are going to live. It's so so pretty. And it's so fun to imagine and play pretend what we want it to look like. Ohhh. We're painting at the moment, that's about all we can do right now, but I'm feeling so uncontrollably nest-y. It's all I want to think about!

The living room! Which is being painted red at this moment!

The bed room!

The Pretty kitchen!

The cool bathroom!

The bachelor food in the fridge right now!

Kurt's old home!

and arty reflection of new home in the old home!

Update of dates.

2011-05-17T20:31:00.000-07:00

It's kind of funny how you put off blogging, and then there's just monumentally (or so it seems) too much to catch up on!

Well, here's a small update.

For those of you who don't know, which is probably no one who reads this blog, Kurt Russell Anderson proposed a proposal of marriage to me on March 31st! Just a few details...we were sitting on top of the van...yes, the van. It was perfect.

We're getting married July 2nd in the Mt. Timpanogos Temple, which is roughly forty-six days...but who's counting? Since we both love the 4th of July, we want our wedding to be a lovely, vintage-y, casual, picnic-y, American-y affair...with nautical touches and a healthy helping of Spectre from Big Fish. Oh gosh, if it turns out like we're thinking, it's going to be so fun. Fun is the goal!

We have rented a beautiful apartment in Provo, south of BYU campus. It's amazing. It's beautiful. It's so. much. fun. (Pictures to come) We're painting right now, and imagining what we would do if we had money for any kind of furniture. The place is unfurnished, and right now what we have is a cute little table from DI. and a twin mattress on the floor of the bedroom for Kurt who has ended his homeless year and is intensely grateful for the shower, the kitchen, and the shelter. It's pretty nice to have a husband who has been homeless for a year, he's easily pleased.

We're both doing school this semester. I'm taking a couple of General education classes so that I'll be able to graduate next April. I thought I'd be all tough, and awesome, and blast myself with stress so that I could get it all out of the way...but oh. man. Taking American Heritage, and Family Finance, being in a play Anne Frank, trying to train for a new job (Wilkenson Center Jamba Juice, come visit!) and planning a wedding...I feel a little overwhelmed. Especially with these classes. Taking 2 classes that can be considered moderately difficult during the regular semester is one thing, squeezing all of that info into seven weeks is madness for my poor, sieve-like brain. I'm glad they'll be over quickly, but I may just barely survive.

I am counting the days. Lit'rally. I have this little page of squares in my notebook that I fill in every day, ticking off the days and weeks until the play and school will be over, and until I can get hitched! Phew. It can't come soon enough.

I have a few enticements and rewards for myself waiting at the end of the semester! I'm going to buy myself a big bag of chocolate-covered cinnamon bears, Kurt, being the amazingly wonderful man he is, got us tickets to see Ray LaMontagne and Brandi Carlile in June, bridal showers and family fun...oh, and a little thing called Eternal Marriage to The Most Wonderful Man on the Earth. Ugh. Can't wait.

Father Goose Fashion

2011-03-27T22:46:00.001-07:00

ok, so the new thing is daily fashion blogs. There are a lot of cute mormon ones, and here's a plug for my gorgeous and enviably fashionable friend Rebecca Hammond. Goodness gracious, she's amazing.Anyways, so in my internet travels through these blogs, there are a bunch of wonderful trends that I am totally loving right now, the topknot hairstyle being one. (I am starting to wear the topknot alllll the time. I have enough hair for it! Let the rejoicings rejoice! It took a minute to get used to, and a minute to convince myself I didn't look like Miss Stacy. But I love it hard now.)

Anyways, in my Dialects class (Yes, DIALECTS! You get to learn and speak in accents without being obnoxious or pretentious! Best thing EVER.)

Anyways, our teacher always shows us movie clips when we're starting a new dialect. Last week we started French, and we were watching a clip of the delightful "Father Goose" with the wonderful Cary Grant and the gorgeous Leslie Caron.

I wish I could find this clip for you because it is hilarious, and she gets drunk and he's charming as always, but I noticed that the exquisite Leslie Caron's outfit and hairstyle are basically the height of fashion right now.

Just look. Look!

I love it! And it just goes to show you that fashion is timeless!

Do the Pretty Girl Rock.

2011-03-25T08:59:00.000-07:00

Ok, I totally have a a girl crush on Mindy Kaling (Kelly Kapoor from The Office) all due to her Twitter. Girl is hilarious.

And I get a lot of music suggestions from her Tweets.

This song is one of them. I'm not a super R&B lover, but for some reason, this song is totally addictive to me. I cannot stop listening to it.

Plus I'm a total sucker for videos that do a through-the-ages thing.

Oh the clothes of yesteryears

How gorgeous is she? Holy crap.

(Don't you love the TLC homage at the end? Oh the silky pajamas)

And the song is hilariously conceited, but honestly, don't you think the women of today need a little self-confidence? I know I do. I'm sick of self deprecation, and comparisons and beating myself up. Probably you are too.

We should all just do the Pretty-Girl Rock.

(My favorite lines include: "Boys wanna marry lookin' at my derri--ere, you can stare but if you touch it Im'ma bury! Pretty as a pitcha, sweeter than a swisha, mad 'cause I'm cuter than the girl that's witcha")

Stash N' Nuggies.

2011-03-21T17:47:00.000-07:00

Hey, I bet you didn't know that I'm dating a famous person.

Well, I am.

He's known around these parts (Provo) as Homeless Kurt.

Homeless Kurt wrote a song.

It's about mustaches and chicken nuggets.

Then he made a music video.

Here it is. Watch and spread around. Help make him even more famous.

Yes. That's him. That's my man.

And I'm proud.

Sleeping (Raging) Beauty

2011-02-28T22:21:00.000-08:00

So, I have this little problem. I like to call it "Sleep Rage."

You know how at the end of the movie "Hook," Tinkerbell whispers to Peter Pan "You know that place between sleep and awake? That place where you still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you, Peter Pan."

Well, Tink, that place is sometimes where I feel like killing people.

When I'm asleep and something, or someone wakes me up, there is a period of time, before I am fully conscious, mind you, where I am completely and justifiably (to myself) homicidal towards that something or someone.

I've thought of killing, or at least injuring some of my very best friends because they've talked loudly, made noise or done something to wake me from my slumber.

This is probably a bad thing. Now, take all this with a grain of salt. I never really have thought of killing anyone. I just really really really really really really really really really really really really really really reallyreallyreally want them to get out of the world.

That's all.

And then I become just a liiiitle more conscious, and I realize...that I'm still irritated, but less homicidal.

Then I become just a liiiiitle more conscious than that, and then I realize that I'm awake and there's nothing I can do about it, and oh well.

And then, and only then, sometimes, does the Sleep Rage end.

Photo found on Hyperbole and a Half.

P.S. I realize how fully crazy this post makes me sound. I guess I am. Sorry bout it.

Life's Leading Ladies.

2011-02-26T23:05:00.000-08:00

Lately, I've been thinking about my future.

And freaking out a little bit.

Yes yes, the plight of all college students. It's a very common story. They get to that point where they realize that college doesn't last forever, graduation is rapidly approaching, and they still have no idea what they want to do.

I'm in the Acting Program at BYU. It took me 2 years to get in. Two years of stress and playing the Game, and doing everything I could just to make it in.

I'm in.

I'm in...now what?

I have no idea. During a recent theater trip to LA, we were able to do a Q&A with a large group of actors who were friends and colleagues of my teachers. They described the process and the way that an actor "makes it" in LA.

It's not for me. It's just not for me.

And it got me thinking...what is for me? What do I want to do? What do I do with this mostly practically useless degree and incredibly impractical career choice of mine?

Then, while listening to the Pocahontas soundtrack the other morning, I had a small ephiphany about the kind of person I am. And I realized I'm not really the leading lady type. (not in theatre, but in Life. Capital L for dramatic effect.)

Get ready for this one guys, this is embarrassing.

Because, really, if my life was Pocahontas, I would be Nakoma. The friend. The placid, complacent, platitudinous, prosaic best friend. The one who doesn't like to make waves, or even ripples, really. I don't dive off of waterfalls, or have animal friends, or talk to trees. I don't risk it all to be different or to go against the grain. I'm not ambitious. I don't have any grand schemes, or plans. I don't feel any burning need to change the world, or change the way things work. Sometimes being Nakoma makes me not very fun, sometimes it makes me afraid to take risks, sometimes it makes me miss opportunities.

Look at that face. The disapproval. Yikes.

The question is: Shouldn't I be the leading lady of my own life?

Can't be I be Pocahontas, canoeing bravely around river bends, singing with those mountain voices, defying the conventions, changing the world, having a hot bod and ridiculous hair and a sweet tattoo? I mean, look at this woman!

Stop it Pocahontas, you're fabulous. No, really, stop.

I don't know exactly what conclusion I've come to about this discovery. Right now I'm halfway between understanding that this is the way I am, and being this way isn't necessarily a bad thing, and being at peace with my Nakoma-ness; and knowing that I've got to start making some fundamental changes in myself in order to better serve my life and future.

But mostly...I just feel like this:

So basically, I have no answer. This was pretty stream of consciousness. (Conscious? I was never taught grammar properly.) I guess that this is just life, finding out where you fit in; which character molds you fit into, which you combine, which you stretch, and which you break. I also guess that life is blindly stumbling along, trying your best to have faith even though you're terrified....cause that's what I'm doing. Yikes.

Now, watch this video. This song is ridiculously wonderful. It'll make you feel good.

Moral of the story: Pocahontas is my favorite Disney movie.

And I'm lame for making this extended of a metaphor about myself from animated Disney characters.

Goodnight.

Lazy Music Post

2011-02-22T14:23:00.000-08:00

Okay, here are two songs that I cannot stop listening to right now.

I'm a pretty eclectic music listener...can you tell?

Valumtime's Day.

2011-02-13T23:16:00.000-08:00

Ok. So I'd just like to send a big, fat this song:

To this guy:

Yeah Kurt. I'm being sappy. Deal.

Don't be embarrassed. Ok?

He's unbelievable. I punch (typo, but it was funny, so I kept it) myself everyday to make sure I'm not dreaming that he's my wonderful, hilarious, loving, silly boyfriend and bestfriend.

He hates Valentine's day, but I don't care.

Happy Valumtime's, Dear.

Thanks for being better and more best than any boyfriend that I could possibly imagine.

Kurt, I know you're embarrassed. Sorry.

annnnd....

One more picture...can't help myself.

One More Candle and Trip Around the Sun

2011-02-09T00:03:00.000-08:00

It's true. I've made it around the Sun one more time. I'm now 21.

21 is (I know I know) very young.

However, it cannot be denied as a landmark.

I think that despite 20 being the first age out of the teens, 21 is the first year of real adulthood.

Adulthood.

Yuck.

I am currently in the city of Angels. In an angelically beautiful, if swankily inadequate hotel.

(aka no continental breakfast. which I was counting on saving and eating for at least two of the days' meals.)

I am at an acting and theatre festival.

Ever get the birthday blues?

They're not even necessarily blues. The blues that, for a lack of a better term, make you feek vaguely discontent and squirmy inside, and all for reasons that you can't explain.

I had an emotional tearful outburst at the end of today, and for the life of me, I couldn't figure out why.

I had a beautiful day today. A group of BYU kids decided to go to Disneyland. I hitched a ride in the van and got picked up by my wonderful sister-in-law and niece and spent a wonderful day with them.

I saw dolphins, guys. Dolphins.

They said "happy birthday" to me. Kind of.

I don't know why birthdays incite such strange emotions in people. or maybe just me? I don't know. It maybe that I miss my family. It may be spending so much time with my niece made me emotional. It may be that leaving her made me sad. It may be that I miss my boyfriend. It may be that talking to a group of recognizable professional actors tonight in a Q&A made me question my fundamental fitness for the acting profession. And it very well may be that I dropped my wallet in the restroom of a Chevron gas station in Fillmore, Utah, while trying to avoid a very large puddle of vomit from a very small girl, and it had yet to come back to me in the mail, despite the assurance that it has been sent...

But I think, in addition to all of these things, my brilliant friend Mariah said that birthdays always feel weird because there's always an expectation of change, which never really happens. You never ever really feel different on your birthday. You always wake up thinking "I'm a year older, do I feel any different?" and then you never do, and then you always end up feeling vaguely dissatisfied with the day, however great the day was.

So, I had a good cry. A good laughy cry with big fat teardrops, and re-crys and big, frustrated hand gestures, and hugs. Then I went down to the beautiful gym on the fourth floor of the hotel, and ran really hard for 30 minutes. And then I felt like I wanted to throw up a little. And then I took a shower and got in my clean, white hotel-y bed and sat with my damp hair on my pillow, feeling refreshed, clean and tired, and wrote a badly written blog.

I feel better. I love so so many people of my life, family and friends, and cannot believe how well they take care of me, and deal with me, and love me. I am so grateful to them.

and happy birthday to me, saith the dolphins.

Button, Button, who's got the button?

2010-12-04T22:50:00.000-08:00

Check out the button on my sidebar!

It's for Out of the Woods Designs.

My mother designs, burns and paints wood furniture and plaques, and is incredibly talented.

She is amazing.

Probably-asaurus.

2010-11-05T09:28:00.000-07:00

So. I hate that I mostly only feel like blogging when I'm procrastinating something.

right now, it's finishing a geology term paper.

Yes. Geology. Term. Paper.

Why? Oh yes, I've been asking myself that too.

What's my topic? Oh no big deal.

It's just this bad-A sea-lizard.

THE MOSASAUR.

Look at that guy. Terrifying right?

Yikes.

So now I know more about this late-cretaceous beastie than I ever would want to.

(If its size weren't terrifying enough, this guy has teeth on the ROOF of its mouth. There is no escape)

So...now that you're here....

I forgot what I was going to say.

Really though.

I had a good idea. And now it's gone.

This idea probably would have changed your life.

After reading this blog, you probably would have gone out into the world, gone on a 15-mile run, cooked an amazing 4 course meal and then made about 4 people fall in love with you.

Really though. I'm sure it was probably brilliant.

You probably would have helped a homeless man, sung an opera, made several matches for best friends, slapped Keira Knightley in the face, saved 3 orphans from a bear-shark, and then given a Tony-award winning performance.

Honestly.

Probably.

Maybe these are just all things that I want to do.

Probably.

But in the mean time, watch this video. My mom and I do. All the time.

It's my favorite.

Heidi's Daily Affirmation.

2010-10-25T13:29:00.000-07:00

I must admit that this post is plagiarism.

I took the idea from Emily. Whose blog I love.

Here is it. Pribbles and Prabbles.

She did this first

and probably better, but here goes.

You've probably seen this video.

She's pretty adorable right?

I love it. I also love that attitude.

This is the attitude that I have about my life at this very moment!

I can be a SHARK.

Now my whole life is great.

I can do anything good!

I like my school

I like my hair

I like my Scarletts!

I like my dads

]I like my play

I like my sisters

I like my whole house

I like my moms

I like my Kurts

I like my Senorita Eeeeeeeva Blancas

I like my church

I like my brothers

I like my

domesticity

I like my roommates

I like my whole life!

My whole life is great

I can do anything good

Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah...

I can do anything good!

BETTER THAN ANYONE

The Game

2010-10-22T08:08:00.001-07:00

Here's yet another Dallas Clayton poem.

I love him.

LIFE INSTRUCTIONS

Child 1: This game doesn’t have directions.

Child 2: So?

Child 1: So how do you know if you are playing it right?

Child 2: It’s fun. When a game is fun you’re playing it right.

-Dallas Clayton

I think there's a lot to be said of this. Unfortunately, I didn't get enough sleep last night to figure out exactly what.

I'm sure you can figure it out. You're smart and wonderful people.

-The Little Red Haired Girl

Stage Door!!!

2010-10-20T12:28:00.000-07:00

Watch this to see how amazing my show is going to be. Oh it is.

Also, don't look for me in this trailer, I'm not in it.

But I AM in the play!

So come see it!

We open next Wednesday, the 27th and run through November 13th!

You can get tickets online, or on BYU campus in the HFAC!

Here's the thing.

2010-10-08T08:27:00.000-07:00

This is my new goal, thanks to a little help from Marc Johns. Check him out.

I'm realizing it's easier just to try and be happy, even when you're not.

It's all in what you focus on.

and guesswhatsurprise!

Trying to be happy, makes you happy.

So here for you, my four faithful blog readers (all within my family, I'm guessing)

is yet another of my happy lists:

1. Oh my gosh the weather. I know, I know. Every girl, and every girl who blogs is talking about how amazingly wonderful this weather is and thescarvesandbootsandsweaters. yes. I feel the same way. But oh, the chilliness, the rain, THE THUNDER AND LIGHTENING! I've been waiting for 2 years for a good thunderstorm in Utah, and finally got one yesterday. It was wondrous. It makes me put on my "autumn" playlist on my ipod, and float away to the strains of the Amelie, The Village and Little Women soundtracks, Iron and Wine, Nickel Creek, Joni Mitchell, Josh Ritter, the Weepies and more lovelies. This makes me happy. It's Cozy weather. Capital C-Cozy.

2. How happy I am with my living situation. I thought it was a miracle when I got housing at all, and in the complex of my dreams. I went in with one roommate that I knew, and two strangers. I was nervous. And I LOVE THEM. It's wonderful. I'm incredibly happy with my roommates, my house, my ward and the environment I now find myself in. I've never been super involved in my student ward or apartment complex, and have mostly created my social circle outside of those parameters. However, this year, I am making an effort to be more involved. Play rehearsals make this difficult, but I am trying. But all, in all, my new living situation is highly pleasing. Highly.

3. I can again feel inspired, fashion-wise. I lost my fashion bravery for a while. It's back now. And right in time for Autumn. Today I am wearing Navy blue and black together. Which, in my mind takes the kind of attitude and posture which indicates that this wasn't a mistake, but a purposeful decisions. Do I think too much about clothes? Yes.

4. My hair is growing!!!

5. Coooooooking. I love cooking. I don't know why. It's all I want to do. I want to drop out of school and be a cook. What I love the most is inventing things with the items I have in my kitchen. Which generally means it will have either cilantro, or curry in it...or both. On Wednesday, I was having an absolutely terrible day. A Jonah day. Just the worst. Then I came home, and realized I had some leftover canned pumpkin in my fridge, and I whipped some pumpkin-curry chicken. It turned out pretty good, a little too salty, but pretty dang good. There's something incredibly calming about cooking, and I've realized that almost nothing makes me simultaneously happier or more stressed out than cooking for others.

I'm not a perfectionist in any area of my life, but when it comes to baking, I freak a little bit. Over Conference weekend, my roommates and some friends and I created a little cozy nest in our living room, piling cushions, blankets and each other all over our floor and carpets. I baked pumpkin bread saturday morning, and coffee cake on Sunday morning. Saturday night, I baked a couple of strawberry rhubarb pies for my friends Bethany and Graham. Almost all of these baking episodes had a serious incident that affected the product for the worse. The crust decided to be made of crumbly sand, and hate me. By the time I had figured out how to work with it, one of the pies was...special. The other one wasn't too bad though. All of this baking made me sososo happy. Again, can Julie and Julia be my life?

6. Stage Door. Seriously this play is going to be gooooood. Come buy your tickets! It starts the 27th of October and runs through November 13th.

7. I have some of the best people around me that ever were. Seriously. My family is the best. My friends, I've really discovered this year, are invaluable to my life. I can't thank them enough for listening to me whine dramatically, or cry dramatically, or giving me support exactly when I need them the most. Miracles. I have angels in my life.

Complementary Me.

2010-10-01T07:45:00.000-07:00

"Oh dear me, what a strange peculiar thing that I should always see, someone just like me..."

-Elizabeth and the Catapult

I've been noticing a trend in my life.

The trend is doppelgangers.

I don't know why. I don't know how. But I have a million of these so-called "twins" walking around in the world.

I used to think it was just the fact that most people think red hair makes twins of everyone. When the Parent Trap came out, everyone and their mom swore I looked exactly like "that girl in the movie"...Lindsay Lohan...Yikes. And, honestly, I was flattered, because I ADORED that movie, and I wanted nothing more than to be Hallie with her twist-and-clip hair, bangs, chinese dress, fluffy purse, and blue nail polish. She was the ultimate cool. But really, we both just had red hair. It wasn't even the same color red. Not everyone with red hair looks the same!

But lately, I've noticed that when I mention the red hair phenomenon, people are saying, "But she didn't have red hair."

I just don't know.

This is also compiled with the fact that literally, close to every single new person I've met throughout my life has told me that I remind them of someone they already know.

I can't figure out if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

One one hand, it's like people are comfortable with me because I seem familiar to them...

On the other hand...I remind them of someone they don't like...

On a third, mutant-hand, I am completely un-unique.

Un-unique? Is there another word for that?

Whatever.

Anyways, I'm finding this interesting.

The doppelganger effect.

Addendum: Literally 20 minutes after I posted this, my friend came and got me to show me my "doppelganger" in the HFAC. I didn't see the resemblance.

Addendum again: I'm thinking of using the above picture for Halloween. My hair looks almost exactly like that right now.

Thoughts.

2010-09-29T13:39:00.000-07:00

I'd like to tell you all about a little green herb that makes me feel riiiilll good...

Yes. Yes, you've guessed it.

Cilantro.

Has there ever been anything as glorious as this plant? I submit that there is not. I now put cilantro in everything I make. Seriously. Ramen. So good. I put in on baby spinach with a little bit of lemon juice, and I don't need any more dressing than that! I put it in this chicken tikka-masala-type thing that I invented last Sunday.

It has become a staple in my fridge and life.

I shall probably name one of my children cilantro.

Joking.

But, really.

Here are some more thoughts from my head, I guess. I know, boring, right?

When you get new music, do you ever feel this strange sort of guilt if you attach onto one song, listen to it over and over and neglect the others a bit?

I do that.

I feel like I have this obligation to the rest of the album, and I am not fulfilling it, and I also might be hurting the feelings of the other songs.

Also, I looked at the wig I'll be wearing for Stage Door. All I can say is, I will not look like Heidi. Good luck trying to find me onstage. It would take my own mother the whole show to find me. It's blonde. Like this dishwater, greenish, dull blonde. The wig is also made of real. human. hair. It give-a me the jeeblies. It's from Korea. It was once on the head of a woman from Korea...or man. I guess I don't really know. The history of that hair.

This was random and not very interesting. Sorry.

Stop this train.

2010-09-19T16:17:00.000-07:00

So. Sometimes being a grown-up is fun.

It's fun when you get to run around London and Paris by yourself. I learned that this summer. Being the baby of my family by a large age gap has left me without several basic survival skills, and largely dependent on others. This summer, however, when I was able to go to London, I was pleased to be able to master things and find my own way around.

The height of this grown-upness came during the travel week-end. Two friends and I decided to travel to Paris for the four day trip.

I found and booked our hostel in Monmartre. Found our way around. Mastered the metro. Spoke as much French as possible, and was really brave about speaking to strangers and asking for help and directions in French. I led my friends around Paris. They called me Tourguide Heidi. I'm bragging a little. But only because it was so new and unlike me and so much fun.

But being a grown-up kind of stinks sometimes when you have to make decisions. Decisions are not my friend. In fact, Decisions and I are enemies. But here I am. Making hard decisions. Being a grown-up. Satisfying. Also, painful. Also, confusing.

Can't I just rewind to the time I was still playing Barbies?

Oh wait...I played with Barbies until I was like 14.

Not to mention this little incident...

Which may or may not have been the summer before last...you don't know! (That's John Smith, Pilgrim Lady and Padme Amidala...yikes.)

Anyways. Even being 14 would be simpler than now. But then I guess I'd be stressing over things like no boys dancing with me or liking me ever at lame Connecticut stake dances. I guess that was pretty hard for me then.

I guess what I'm learning here is this is why we grow up. We are given challenges that we are able to handle as we go along. I wouldn't have been able to handle what I'm going through now at 14, which is why I'm going through it NOW and not THEN. I guess it's all designed to work itself out.

Though I do love those times when I can get together with some friends and watch Swan Princess and Anastasia and remember the time when all I wanted to do was be a princess...

Ebony Eyes!

2010-09-16T11:34:00.000-07:00

Oh my gosh. My gosh.

This is my happy song of the moment.

I fell back in love with Stevie Wonder this summer. (How were we ever apart?)

And seriously, just TRY not to smile when this song starts.

I dare you.

It's enough to make me wish I had ebony eyes myself!

Try to remember the kind of september...

2010-09-14T13:38:00.000-07:00

My life is turning all around right now. Here are some things that I am doing right now:

Taking a stage combat class....yes. Me. The girl who can hurt herself sitting on a couch, is taking a stage combat class. And injuring myself every day.

Trying to continue my running routine. I realize that I could run 4 miles. On an indoor track. In air-conditioning. At sea level. Yeah. Utah is pretty different. Also, running is a marvelous band-aid for a broken heart.

Learning that make-up is overrated.

Busting my bum in intermediate Irish dance. So hard. So worth it.

My niece is the most amazing. And I am endeavoring to have this kind of joy in my own life.

I've been cast in this play:

Ginger Rogers and Katherine Hepburn are my favorite ever.

I'm playing a couple of the fun bantering girls in the boarding house.

If you haven't seen this movie. Run. Run and rent it.

I'm going to look like this.

Or this.

I wish.

And, get this, the whole play is going to be in BLACK AND WHITE.

You heard me.

You should come and see it.

For Viv.

2010-09-02T20:00:00.001-07:00

This is for my lovely love, Viv, as she is far away in India. She would love this. Will? Do you read my blog still, Lib?

In other news, I got my fashion bravery back! Woohoo! Also, my hair is curly and (comparatively) long now, and no one recognizes me, it's pretty fun. It's like having a new identity, only it's just new hair.

My what?

2010-09-01T09:09:00.000-07:00

Today in Geology class, my professor was discussing the formation of the our solar system. As he was doing this, he happened to offhandedly mention the name of a certain planet...you know the one.

However, I noticed something interesting. He pronounced the name differently, not giving emphasis to the usual part. I thought "Well that's clever, he's trying to downplay the childish humor of that word."

Then I realized he had pronounced it "Urine-us."

Yup, still funny.

Happy.

2010-07-24T20:10:00.000-07:00

Here is something that made me happy today.

Oh cuss. This movie is so good. I forgot how much I loved it, and consequently placed it in the Heartwarmers-That-I'm-Never-In-The-Mood-For category of movies. Do you know what I'm talking about? Maybe I'm just cold hearted.

This movie is such a gem. It's a wonderful love story of both the romantic and familial kind. Johnny Depp does these amazing comedic routines from Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton and wins your heart immediately with all his strangeness and heart-hurting sweetness.

And with the amazing soundtrack from Rachel Portman (Chocolat, Nicholas Nickleby, Emma) the movie contains some of the most joyful moments I've ever seen. Also, who couldn't love the movie's main song I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) by the Proclaimers? That's gotta be the one hit wonder on the majority of people's ipods, and when it comes up on shuffle, you know you have to sing along. You know you do.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oY5tSxv4oU

(It won't let me embed the video. But go here. Watch this.)

Mmm. Look at those boys. Pale. Pasty. Thickly be-spectacled. Very Scottish. Expressionless. How can you resist? (But really, I love this song.)

I just wanted to share the bit of happiness that came into my day. Go rent this movie!

P.S. I want Sam (Johnny) to swing by my window on a window washing harness. My bedroom is on the ground floor. Do you think this will be a problem?

You guys!

2010-07-14T15:03:00.000-07:00

Hey you guys! I've hit the two mile mark! I can now run 2 miles at a time! Are you so proud?

I'm pretty proud of myself.

One one more mile to go!

A thing of beauty.

2010-07-09T19:37:00.000-07:00

" A thing of beauty is a joy forever."

(Listen to this while reading)

The movie Bright Star, directed by Jane Campion is a joy. It is so incredibly beautiful in every way, it has no other choice. Whew. This blog started out like a serious-smart-person-movie-review. It's not. I just wanted to express how much I loved this movie and share its beauty with others. I knew I would love it from the moment I first saw the trailer, and thanks to Netflix Instant Watch, I was able to watch it during a night of head ache and insomnia.

The story is so beautiful in its simplicity. The poetry of John Keats, which I wish I was more than summarily acquainted with, is infused in so many scenes. There are incredibly wonderful recitations of his poems by Ben Whishaw (as Keats) and Abbie Cornish (as Fannie Brawne) that, done by another actor could have seems pretentious or dry. The poetry was heartfelt, sincere and completely honest. As Keats says when giving Fannie a poetry lesson, is that "a poem needs understanding through the senses" and a poem, like the experience of diving into a lake, cannot and does not need to be worked out, but must be luxuriated in, it is "an experience beyond thought." This movie felt like a a lake to be luxuriated in, experienced and, above all, felt.

If you're like me, and you have a love for tragic romance and beauty, you will love this film. It follows the three year love of the poet John Keats and Fannie Brawne. Their love is almost a character in itself, and like the movie it is engaging, graceful, pure and beautiful. The way their relationship grows and matures is really wonderful to see. I'm not going to say anymore, because I don't want to spoil it. Highly recommended.

I also apologize for using the word "beautiful" so much. But really. Beautiful.

Just look:

Oh my life!

2010-07-07T15:59:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures that I am in love with right now.

I was born in the wrong time. I'm sure of it. Here are some pictures of what I prefer.

I saw this painting in the National Portrait Gallery in London. Isn't she the most fabulous?Dame Anna Neagle. Red headed actress. Me please? Also, I love the green toe of her shoe peeping out. So pretty.

This girl is amazing.

I'm looking for a retro style bikini. Probably not as bloomer-ish as this, but look how fabulous this woman is.

Holy long and lanky limbs batman. Gorgeous.

This is my favorite. These three are just the coolest of cool.

Check out the girl on the left. The smirk. The saddle shoes. The trousers. The bikini top. The pose. She's got it all. This picture is just too amazing. The composition of it, with the sign behind...

Is it possible to miss an era that I never lived in?

Last 4 pictures found on The Sartorialist.

note of a melodic nature.

2010-07-01T08:56:00.001-07:00

EPIC BALLAD

A powerful song
is one
that makes me remember
something
that never actually happened to me.

-Dallas Clayton

All right, does anyone have any good music to recommend? I've been living in a busy Provo bubble, and then a crazy London trip, and I have almost no new music except the sofabulousit'swack new Ingrid Michaelson album. Anyways, does anyone have any suggestions? I'm pretty open in terms of style, I like almost anything. It would be muchly appreciated.

Love,

Heidi Lynn

The Connecticut Challenge.

2010-06-27T14:28:00.000-07:00

I'm giving myself a challenge!

So I'll be back home in the good ol' Connecticut for about a month and a half, with no plans, no job and much, much free time. This is exciting. For a lounge monkey like me, I like to lay around with nothing in particular to do. However, when the nothingness goes on too long, I tend to go into a depression. I think that a month and a half is a good amount of nothing. So I have given myself a challenge to fill up some time. I think it's a good opportunity to work on improving myself. I have three areas of improvement that I will be working on: physical, mental and spiritual. I will put this challenge on my blog so I will feel like I have a little bit of accountability. But really, I don't think anyone reads it, so it'll just be all in my head. But hey, I'm a big sucker for the placebo effect, so let's get going!

I'm setting goals to:

-Go running 4 times a week. I hate running. But I know how good it is for you. I need to get myself in shape, as my endurance right now is about zero.

-Be able to run at least 3 miles at a time. I know for some of you serious joggers, 3 miles is easy-peasy. But right now, for me, one mile is almost too much. So that'll be something to work on.

-Do ab work/crunches/pilates type things 5 times a week. My crazy intense modern dance teacher from fall semester instilled in me this borderline masochistic love of doing ab exercises until I'm about to die. But I need to get back into the habit.

-Eat HEALTHY. London habits, go away.

-Finish the Book of Mormon. And really read it. I've read it once a year since I was eleven, but I need to really read it. With pen in hand. With my heart and mind open.

-Read at least one religious book.

-Read the Brothers Karamazov. I need to be better read.

I guess this is kind of ambitious. I don't know, is it? I'm not a very ambitious or driven person. And that's why I need things like this. I also need to cut down on my internet time. Gosh dangit the computer is such a lovely time sucker.

P.S. To those 9 followers of mine, thank you. I don't even know if you're still following, but thanks anyway!

P.P.S. Like the new background? Autumn. Always.

I want.

2010-06-24T20:48:00.001-07:00

Here are some things that I want.

(in no specific order)

-To learn to play the ukulele

-To like exercising

-My hair to grow out of this ridiculously and stubbornly awkward stage it's in right now. Pleasepleaseplease grow. I'm begging you.

-To be a nomad and travel around the world and waitress in tiny cafes and pubs.

-To visit all the small towns and villages in Ireland and the UK...and be a waitress in their tiny cafes and pubs.

-To find a couple of bathing suits that I am satisfied with and feel comfortable with myself in. (impossible)

-To have Cyd Charisse's legs.

-For Connecticut not to be so stinking humid.

-To be in a show. Right. Now.

-To see my niece.

-To see all the people that I love who are far away from me right now.

-To know how to use the "who" and "whom" rule correctly.

-To read and read and read books.

-To listen to Ingrid Michaelson for the rest of my life.

-To go to another Ingrid Michaelson concert.

-To have the food (let's face it, treats) I loved in London with me in America. Oh chocolate digestives, minstrels, fruit gums and galaxy bars...you are gone from me.

-To find some good new music. For free.

-To be able to wear my contacts again without my eyeballs freaking out.

-To have the patience to learn to sew better.

-To be a dancer.

-To sing.

-To see into my future.

I'm a blogging failure.

2010-05-17T07:47:00.000-07:00

I'm officially the worst. But here are some other blogs (of the other two lovely people pictured above) to look at to follow my activities here in London until I get my butt in gear and post some pictees and storees.

http://richieandthequeen.blogspot.com/

http://cheersandie.blogspot.com/

Sorry that I'm the worst.

Much of my reluctance comes from the fact that my hair is in the most awkward state it's EVER been in. Ever. Also horrendously coinciding with the most pictures being taken of me ever in my life ever. Wonderful.

Here are some pictures to tide you over! (Like you care...)

Me and a GIANT fetus in a simulated Womb Room at the Natural History museum. Sick.

Enjoying my first ever official English fish and chips (I was very specific about where it came from. It had to be a hole in the wall, purely fish and chips place.) Also, check out the "healthiest meal for all the family" on the bag...I'm so sure.

Being a groundling at the globe!

Frolicking at Kew Gardens!

Me and Andie in front of the London Eye!

Me and Richie and Andie (The other blog owners! Seriously, check them out) at the Globe!

London-y things!

2010-04-30T06:17:00.000-07:00

I've been frolicking. Walking. All day long. I love it so much.

Yesterday I walked from about 12:30 to about 9 at night.

I am footsore, and bodysore, but my heart and soul are happy.

pictures are soon to come!

Hellooo London.

2010-04-28T05:23:00.000-07:00

Here I am. London, England.

I'm loopy as can be.

I've basically been up since Tuesday morning. I could not sleep on the plane. I can never sleep on planes. So I watched The Young Victoria, New Moon and Whip It for those seven hours instead.

Now, I'm paying for it. I feel like my body is rolling in circles, and is on an elevator going up and down.

But I'm here in London!

I've bought London groceries, I've breathed London fumes, I've ridden in a London cab. I've gazed upon the amazing street my flat is on!

Our flat is right across the street from beautiful Hyde Park. I can't wait to explore. But maybe I'll wait until the room stops spinning. Might be a good idea. I should shower. But that would take effort. I should unpack. That would also take effort. Basically, my fingers are the only things that feel like moving right now.

I still don't really feel like I've left America, though. It's kind of funny. Maybe it'll take a day or two to set in.

My flat is on the 5th floor. Atop a set of stairs. My, won't my bum be looking nice at the end of six weeks?

It really is beautiful here. I can't wait to get settled in and in a schedule, and start exploring and wandering and playing! Woohoo! I'm here!

Love to you all.

The Little Redhaired (Ginger) Girl

So What?

2010-04-16T22:28:00.000-07:00

Well, so what if I want to watch this movie every day of my life?

So what if it makes me want to be married to someone who is the butter to my bread and the breath to my life, and cook for them, and that's it?

I hope my future husband is as patient with me as Movie Julie Powell's husband was with her. He put up with a lot, my husband will have to, too.

So what if it specifically makes me want to be married to Stanley Tucci, who I already loved immensely, anyways?

Seriously, who couldn't love that man?

And these two women? I couldn't love them more.

They are two of my absolute favorite actresses.

Meryl Streep is absolutely incredible in this role. Because of Julia Child's cartoonish persona that has been so often parodied in comedy sketches and radio shows (Prarie Home Companion, anyone?) the performance, by anyone else could have turned into caricature. It wasn't. It was maybe the most endearing performance ever. It was honest, lovely, full of joy and just so so good. She baffles me with her talent.

Also, people have been telling me all year long, for a while about once a day that I was exactly like Amy Adams in this movie. Now it's probably because I have short red hair, but I still think it's flattering. I adore her. Also my hair in its starting-to-grow-out stages is marvelously awkward, and starting to look like her gross short hair wig from the movie, all long in the back and weird.

But, hey, if Amy can still be cute, so can I, dangit!

Anyways, I just wanted to share one of the things that is making me happy right now. Oh gosh. It's on netflix instant watch. And I watch it instantly. All the time. Happyhappyhappy.

Remember this?

2010-04-15T19:08:00.000-07:00

I may or may not be speaking specifically to one R. Anderson, but also to all girls specifically my age when I say:

Remember this?

(Watch all the way to the end, or skip a little. I swear it's worth it)

There is just so much about this video that links me directly back to my pre-teendom.

-The big orange toggle pants and baseball shirts (so hip),-

the industry-cooked-up-pop-group (can't you see some big fatcat producer, chomping on a stogie, saying:

"We gotta get in on this boy band thing, but get this: Let's make em real boys!)

-the dance moves including the swinging of arms and wild, mildly ghetto gesturing.

And really 12 year old boy? Really?

"You are the one and only, and I'm the lost and lonely."

I'm so sure.

This made me laugh so hard.

The shirt blowing back off of the tank top? The checking out of girls?

The bleached hair? The pure pre-pubescence of these boys?

Does anyone remember that their primary exposure was on the INFOMERCIAL that advertised their CD?

aaaaahahahaha. Best ever.

Also...I may or may not know all the words.

What?!

Who said that?

P.S. LOOK! Followers! People read this drivel? Also, pretend not to notice that I'm accidentally following my own blog, and don't know how to unfollow it.

Thoughty thoughts

2010-04-11T00:19:00.000-07:00

Here are some thoughts:

My apartment should be a reality show.

Six girls.

One is about to be engaged while living in the very same apartment that her mother did when she, herself, got engaged.

One is desperately in love with her boyfriend and is two weeks away from being separated from him, by several continents, for four whole months.

One is departing for Thailand to teach Thai children to speak English and to make a documentary about human trafficking.

One is in a serious relationship while still quite in love with a missionary who also seems to be perfect for her.

One is re-entering into what seems to be a borderline emotionally abusive relationship and is about to leave for Jerusalem.

One is trying to figure out her life, especially her relationship with a boy who is in love with her.

Five of us are in relationships.

Three of us are headed overseas.

Two of us have uncertain academic futures.

All of us are struggling to figure out what the heck is going to happen to us.

Would you watch? I think I would. It might be annoying though. My character would be, anyway.

More thoughts:

-I leave for London in two weeks. I'm terrified. I'm excited. It doesn't seem real yet, and might not until I arrive at Heathrow Airport on April 28th at 7AM.

-Friends are wonderful. House shows are fun. Talented friends are the most best.

exhibit A.

It was a good night.

-I cannot seem to control my eating habits. I have about zero percent self control or will power when it comes to eating things. It's beginning to scare me.

-I currently have in my purse one of those big clear bottles of fruity antacid chewable tablets. Like the kind your grandmother has in her bathroom. Yes. In my purse. I had 8 today. My stomach hates me. Or more accurately hates food. Hates the food that I indiscriminately stuff, without pause, down my gullet.

-I've decided that if I don't get into the BFA acting program, it's not such a big deal. I feel peace.

Here are some funny things:

My costume for As You Like It included these babies...The most high waisted jeans. ever.

Hot, right? They created, what we so lovingly referred to as "Dinner Plate Bum."

Also these videos are things that have made me laugh lately:

Also, this top one has a warning PG13 for language!

And last but certainly not least, everyone look at my niece. Look how beautiful she is.

(Whitney, can she and Dade get married and have the doubly most beautiful babies ever?)

Anyways, this has been the longest post ever. Love you all who read this blog! Thanks for the time. I really appreciate it. I do.

2010-03-31T13:40:00.000-07:00

NEW FRIENDS

When you meet someone

nicer on accident

than you could ever be on purpose does it make you

angry

at how naturally they inspire

or does it inspire you without you knowing

and leave you

(a few hours, a few days)

better off?

-Dallas Clayton

I Love love.

2010-03-28T23:33:00.001-07:00

So goes a song that we belt out at the end of As You Like It (running through April 2nd, at BYU come and see!)

I love love, I love being in love, I don't care what it does to me!

Seriously though. I've become obsessed with love. Even more than I've already been my whole life. I think it's because we've entered into an age of voyeurism, where I can read love stories galore on facebook and blogs, and also because I've entered into an age where many people around me are falling, quite seriously, into love. It's all around me!

I've had a few opportunities to see some full blown romances that are swiftly, if not already turning into engagements and marriages, from their first budding moments. I feel privileged to have been able to see these beautiful stories for myself, and from such a close vantage point.

I'm hungry for How We Met stories, How We Fell In Love Stories, How We Decided To Get Married stories. Starving. I simply can't get enough. If I read your blog (and I do) and you've recently gotten married, engaged or have a relationship, you can bet your bottom dollar that #1 Tomorrow, there'll be sun and #2 that I've read, pored over and borderline stalked those entries. Multiple times. eesh. Maybe this post isn't such a good idea. I look at facebook wedding picture albums over and over again.

Side note: I'm not over-eager to get married myself, at this point in my life. Don't think I'm some crazycrazy BYU marriage starved 20 year old. (if you're one of those, or were at some point, no offense!)

I just think that love and marriage is such a miracle. The fact that two flawed and imperfect human beings can get it together and commit to each other for time and all eternity is quite the divine miracle. And I love it. I love looking at each of these love stories and how they came to be. Looking at the hiccups that happened along the way, or the way it all flawlessly fell into place, or some crazy mixture of the two is incredibly exciting and interesting to me. I'm also taking religion course at school about LDS marriage and family. It's awesome. It also feeds my need twice a week. Oh gosh. This is sounding worse and worse. But I guess I just wanted to say that I love love. I really do. Also if you've posted marriage-y and love-y things on your blog THANK YOU! And Sorry that I'm such a creepy creeper!

Item: As I wrote this

My roommate just rushed in

telling us that her boyfriend told

her that he loved for for the very

first time. I swear. It's all around.

These two beautiful people are a two of my bestest best friends who are engaged to be married in June!

I was able to the their relationship from the start.

I love it. And them.

Look how gorgeous and happy they are!

The Ingenue that Roared.

2010-03-23T15:15:00.000-07:00

Kelli O'Hara is brilliant. She is a brilliant musical theater actress. I cannot get enough of this video. This song can easily be taken to a corny place, and is often done dancing around like a loon, which I'll admit totally has its place, and can be wonderful. But she plays the opposite. She's vulnerable. She's weak. She's woozy. She's confused. She's so happy she doesn't know what to do with herself.

Best. Thing. EVER. I swear to you.

2010-03-17T21:43:00.000-07:00

Pre-

2010-03-10T23:06:00.000-08:00

I'm having a pre-quarter life crisis. Just when you thought a quarter life crisis was ridiculous. Really though.

I'm having serious trouble deciding if my major is what I really want to do with my life.

Do I picture myself doing this as a career?

If not, what ELSE can I picture myself doing?

Is it lazy and our of fear that I stay with what I know?

Would it be lazy and out of fear to drop it?

I've never had doubts about it before, and these are severe and came out of left field.

think.think.think.think.

A magical land

2010-03-08T09:02:00.000-08:00

I discovered a magical land. Called Bed.

I love my bed. It's not the mot comfortable of mattresses.

And there's a very badly insulated window on the wall right next to it that runs the length of the bed. I've stuffed a sweatshirt along the bottom of it in an effort to block the icy breeze.

I can't say I've really just discovered it. I've always loved Bed. However, lately, I've wanted nothing more than to turn off my alarm in the morning, and cuddle up in my warmed-up blankets and go back to my bizarre morning dreams.

Sometimes when I realize I have to leave Bed, I weep a little weep.

Sunday, with my 12:45 church, I was able to linger. It was wonderful.

ALso, today was one of those mornings when the alarm goes off, and I had NO IDEA what it meant. Do you have those mornings? No idea what that sound is, what it means, where I am, or what I have to do. And then I realize I have to leave my cocoon, and the tears come.

I'm a champion sleeper-inner. If left alone, with no obligations, I can sleep until 3:30. However, I wouldn't recommend it. It leaves you feeling gross.

But sometimes, just sometimes, it's nice to stay in that magical land of horizontality, blankets, and no responsibilities.

A warning

2010-02-26T07:29:00.000-08:00

I'll take a page from The Wild and Wily Brunette's book (blog) and write:

A Letter To My Future Husband

Dear Someone,

I just want to warn you, that this is how I'll probably be. So prepare yourself. Rosalind, in As You Like It, said it best:

Maids are May when they are maids,

but the sky changes when they are wives:

I will be more jealous of thee, than a Barbary cock-pigeon over his hen,

more clamorous then a Parrot against the rain,

more new-fangled then an ape,

more giddy in my desires than a monkey:

I will weep for nothing, and I will do that when you are disposed to be merry:

I will laugh like a Hyena, and that when thou art inclined to sleep.

I'll try not to be like this, but chances are pretty good that I will be.

If it helps, I'm sorry!

You've been warned.

With absolute love and hope,

One of those days (TMI?)

2010-02-23T15:30:00.000-08:00

This might be TMI, but this is my blog, so deal.

All right, females of the world...or the two or three who read this blog...

Does your PMS ever catch you by surprise?

I swear, I'll have a day (like today) when I want to hit everyone in the face, to be alone, and to be held, to run around, and to stay in my bed, to cry my eyes out and to eat a whole jar of tostitos nacho cheese with a bag of chips. (Specificity for a reason? I may have done this yesterday...maybe, maybe not. You don't know)

I. Feel. Awful.

And, for the life of me, I cannot figure out why. I usually end up explaining how I feel to someone (usually the Boy) and they say "Heidi, you're PMSing." To which I reply, "Oh."

EVERY MONTH.

You'd think after 10 years of this, I'd be used to it by now, or at least be able to recognize why I feel so irrationally terrible all of a sudden.

Am I crazy? Does this happen to anyone else?

Tarsmoof!

2010-01-31T20:29:00.000-08:00

It's the last week of Moliere's comedy, Tartuffe at BYU.

If you are in the area, heck if you're in Utah at all, COME AND SEE THIS PLAY.

It is hilarious, gorgeous to look at, and generally just a really really fun experience.

If you can tell from the poster, the theme and look of the play is "Tim Burton." The costumes, make-up and set all mesh beautifully with this theme.

The music, which is all original, is gorgeous and fun.

Seriously. Go see it.

...Plus...you'll get to this handsome gentleman playing Damis...

Who I just happen to like. Alot.

Also I cut all my hair off.

The end.

P.S. Go see Tartuffe. You won't be sorry.

Meet Edarem.

2010-01-29T16:18:00.000-08:00

Really though. Meet him.

This was my first introduction to this man, sent to me by my pretend sister Libby.

YEAH.

that's him. Has there ever been anything scarier in this world?

Just today, I wanted to show my friend this video and found a myriad of other "edarem" videos.

and found this little gem

Make sure you watch the whole thing.

With a little further investigation I found about 100 more videos of him doing things like grinding axes, dancing with his dogs, demonstrating funny walks and singing along to everything from "You'll Never Walk Alone" to "Pretty Woman" to Marilyn Manson.

The hilarity of this strange man now has turned to pathos.

A little more investigation led me to a series of videos that had just text on them.

These videos were pleading for help for Ed, and asking his viewers to send him money to hire a good lawyer to overturn his 5 year prison sentence.

It turns out that his youtube videos were a parole violation from a previous conviction of sexual crime.

Crazy. and sad.

This wasn't intended to be such of a downer. I just wanted to share this delightful oddity of a man and the tiny portion of his interesting story that I've discovered.

Here's one last Ed video. Seriously check him out. You can't believe he's real.

impatient.

2010-01-24T20:14:00.000-08:00

In the words of the Weepies:

"I don't know why it takes so long. I cut my hair, then grow it back. First the thought, and then the act."

I'm applying this quote very literally.

My hair is taking FOR. EVER. to grow out, and I am cutting it all off, the way it was at the beginning of the school year.

I really want this:

But as my hair is lovely and mullet-y, and always in a tiny ponytail, affectionately referred to as "Lil' Nubbins" with my long grown out greasy bangs pinned across my greasy forehead, every single day, and this is a run-on sentence, but my hair is gross right now, and I want to feel pretty again. And it's boring to have ponytail every day, am I right? Even if it's one as tiny as Lil' Nubbins

(Also, in a slightly ashamed undertone, I will state that this short hair makes me stand out and be unique from the crowd of long haired girls at BYU. And being in a program like the Theater one, this can only help me.)

So hopefully sometime this week it will look something like this again:

ok, seriously.

2010-01-13T10:32:00.000-08:00

Check this out:

My sisters are seriously talented.

These are some presents I got for christmas.

From my sister Gloriana:

The middle one. So me. So cute. She knows me well.

And these two from my sister-in-law Jylare. Love these so so much.

I miss my family. Especially this little face. Oh man.

I imagine things.

2009-12-29T20:40:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I find that my imagination is the scariest thing of all.

Spending the next week alone in my apartment will probably lead to all kinds of terrifying imaginings.

Wish me luck!

The Monster of Doctor Frankenstein

2009-12-01T16:32:00.001-08:00

I'm performing in "The Monster of Doctor Frankenstein" all this week. If you're in Provo, or in Utah, come and check it out! It runs wednesday through Saturday, with a two performances on saturday! Tickets are six dollars and you can buy them here!

Here is some more information!

It's with the BYU experimental theater company, and should be very interesting!

Obligatory thanksgiving post.

2009-11-25T00:26:00.000-08:00

Things I am thankful for right now:

Pajamas

toothpaste

being in two shows at once

(being able to be busy doing what I love)

Having THE prettiest dresses in a Christmas Carol

(a little girl came up to me after the show to tell me how pretty my dress was. Oh, I know little girl, I know.)

Having amazing friends

Late night rehearsals and even later night Denny's trips with Frankenstein cast

Being drunkenly tired and finding everything hilarious

My family

Pictures of my new niece Scarlett

My ipod

Prayer

my bed...which I am now going to get into and get some SLEEP.

night!

it may just be the sleep deprivation, but I'm feeling very full of love right now. Love you all...whoever may read this blog...

2009-11-11T08:06:00.000-08:00

Yes. I love Dallas Clayton. All my posts lately have been of his poems.

But I cannot help it. I must share.

What does it mean to you
to be disappointed?
When you imagine disappointment
does it have a face?
A scowl ike an ugly high school thing
coming back at you from the past?

It’d be nice if we could put a face
on all those emotions
that scare us into mediocrity.

Make it easier to poke out their eyes.

-Dallas Clayton

2009-11-04T06:55:00.000-08:00

Seriously guys. I can't stop listening to this song. It's happiness encased in a piano and a voice. Seriously. Listen to this song and see if you don't feel better. It's on repeat on my ipod today.

Also...how adorable is this video? And Michael Buble? Since WHEN did he get so dang attractive?! I'm totally in love with him in this video! (especially when he starts dancing with the marching band)

Challenged.

2009-10-30T20:59:00.000-07:00

You are the best. Unbeatable. Indestructible. The number one champion of everyone around.

You will never be fooled. Never bested. Never bruised. No one even comes close to the scope of your glory.

You are the greatest. Period. So long as you don’t leave your bedroom.

-Dallas Clayton

Lately I've been really up and down in terms of my self esteem. A good day in my improv class or rehearsal can send it soaring into believing that I really am a good actress, and will, someday make it into the acting program here. Then a day of thinking too hard, of comparing too hard, and of fearing too hard and send me plummeting back down into the land of "I'll never make it." From the lack of real challenges in my life, I've developed an attitude of "if it's too hard, I'll just quit." I haven't really taken that route this semester, and really have found the benefits and drawbacks of hard work.

I've just got to keep working hard.

That's all.

2009-10-20T13:02:00.000-07:00

A LETTER TO THE KING

No matter what the scientists say I’ve got it on good authority there aren’t many animals great or small, given the chance would want to be you with all those clothes to buckle and papers to keep up with.

Think about it, they don’t even own cups.

-Dallas Clayton

So, maybe I'm doing three plays. Maybe I'm have a lot of homework. Maybe my back is as hard as a rock and knotty as a piece of pine wood. Maybe my neck is so tense, it's giving me a perma-tension headache. Maybe I haven't had time to do laundry in so long it's embarrassing. Maybe I might stop buying perishable food because I'm never home to eat it before it goes bad.

Maybe I'm being crappy friend and sister and daughter because I have a minimum of 2 rehearsals every day and homework to do and to catch up on.

Maybe I'm making really terrible excuses. No, not maybe. I am.

Maybe I feel like a whiner for writing this all here.

Life is good. Life is wonderful. I have too much to do, but really, I'm enjoying it all. I'm learning so much in so many areas. I am surrounded by love. I feel my Heavenly Father's love palpably every day. I am incredibly blessed. I have the best friends and a wonderful boyfriend and an amazing family who I am going to see this weekend, and a baby niece who I am going to meet and squeeze and kiss. I cannot wait.

Maybe it's time for me to stop whining now.

A good cure.

2009-10-17T02:34:00.001-07:00

Here are some good cures for feeling icky and grimy and scared after watching a scary movie you really shouldn't have watched:

hugs and cuddles

bright stars

prayers

lights

good night texts

blankets

scriptures

Nat King Cole's Christmas Album (Yes I know it's not even Halloween yet, but he's my soul!)

Hope I can get some sleep!

P.S. Don't ever watch the movie Silent Hill. Ever.

This is not a facetious warning. In all seriousness, do NOT watch it.

Look at this madness!

2009-10-16T07:57:00.001-07:00

Luck is on my side...?

2009-10-09T07:58:00.000-07:00

So, I've been having a run of really good luck lately. I've been doing pretty well in my classes (minus Astronomy...) I've been cast in a good mask club, a very interesting platform piece written, directed and acted by great and talented friends, and I got called back for a Christmas Carol at the Hale. I've got great friends, my skin is clearing up a little, the weather is chilly. Things are good. This morning, however, as my roommate, Mariah and I were walking to school, a black cat started walking toward us. We stopped to see what would happen, and if the cat would cross our path. The cat walked deliberately toward us, walked directly in front of me, over my feet, and then went straight between us, leaving Mariah completely untouched.

Great. Let's see what happens now.

Miss Scarlett (Isn't she lovely?)

2009-09-27T18:21:00.000-07:00

Isn't she lovely?

Isn't she wonderful?

Isn't she precious? Less than one minute old.

Isn't she pretty? Truly the angel's best

Oh, I'm so happy, we have been heaven blessed.

Isn't she lovely? Made from love.

"Isn't she lovely"

-Stevie Wonder

Here she is!!!!

2009-09-25T13:33:00.001-07:00

Here's little baby Scarlett Jylare! She was born yesterday (easily fooled?) at 10:03 am, 7.7 lbs and 19 inches, and beautiful!!! I miss her, even though I've never met her, and I can't wait to squeeze her in a month! I'm now Aunt Heidi!

Some things I love right now.

2009-09-18T09:24:00.000-07:00

Autumn

2009-09-16T15:33:00.001-07:00

(Ok, so this is unoriginal, but I just loved loved loved this quote that NieNie posted recently, I had to reblog it.)

Delicious autumn!

My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird

I would fly about the earth seeking successive autumns

-George Elliot

I am such an autumn girl. I guess that's what happens when you're from New England.

(Lighthouse Point, New Haven CT)

That's when that area comes to life, in it's most beautiful form. Autumn is my special time. I love sweater weather. I love the smell of autumn leaves and pumpkins and that certain special bite-in-the-air smell.

I love my autumn music (the Amelie, Village, Once and Pocahontas soundtracks, The Weepies, Counting Crows, Coldplay, The Shins, Guster, Ingrid Michaelson, Iron and Wine, Joni Mitchell, Nickel Creek, Indigo Girls, Sufjan Stevens)

If I could live in a world of perpetual autumn, I would. No questions or reservations. For Christmas last year, my Dad made us all a calendar entitled "Fall in New England should be Year Round", and it was full of gorgeous photos he'd taken one fall, and he's put one for every month of the year. If only life was like that calendar.

I am so sick of the sweaty back that I have from walking to school in the morning with my heavy backpack. The mornings have been deliciously cool, but around 11:00, it starts getting warm again. But the few leaves that have started to change on the mountains shine out like beacons of autumn-y hope.

(I also really loved this other quote from NieNie's post)

It is a common enough case, that of man being suddenly captivated by a woman nearly the opposite of his ideal. -George Elliot

Copying Brita.

2009-09-11T23:41:00.000-07:00

My friend Brita is awesome. Her blogging skills are something that I aspire to have. She recently has decided to read the entire Anne of Green Gables series by L.M. Montgomery. It's reminded me of my own love of the story. Anne of Green Gables has a very very special place in my life and heart. I remember watching our taped-off-of-T.V. versions of Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea all the time (that Continuing Story one was weird though, I didn't like it so much). I have very specific memories of watching it when I was five, shivering at the spooky ghost music when Anne and Diana walk through the "haunted" forest laughing as Diana screams uncontrollably when Anne falls into the well. I loved Anne (although for a brief period of time in my life, I thought that because Anne didn't like having red hair, I shouldn't either, crazy, I know, but that was the power of Anne). Not much later, I started reading the books. They are so incredibly wonderful. They are hilarious, touching, and beautifully written. I have read the entire series so many times that I have lost count. I wish I had all my Anne books here with in Utah, but they're back in Connecticut. Oh, I love them.

Best and the Worst.

2009-09-10T22:20:00.000-07:00

There's not much worse than being ready to go to bed and seeing the pile of newly laundered sheets and pillow cases lying there uselessly next to your bed, and knowing that you have to wrestle them on the mattress and pillows before you can get in. It also always seems to happen on nights when I'm really tired.

That being said...

There's not much better than climbing into a bed of newly washed and fresh-detergently-dryer-sheety smelling bed things. Delicious. Deli-see-us mancub.

p.s. I updated my music playlist. I hope you like it! If there's anything that I took off that you miss listening to, let me know and I'll put it back on!

p.p.s. I love mail.

2009-09-02T20:35:00.000-07:00

I have this massive urge to watch The Village. Unfortunately my DVD has gone missing. I opened the DVD case, and the disc was gone. I only watched it once last year, and I know I had it after that. It's a mystery. And an annoying one. It is one of my favorite movies ever. It's also a movie that makes me feel all Autumn-y. And it's too hot. Too darn hot. I desperately need some Autumn right now. I love this movie. I feel like most people who didn't like it, only disliked it because they were expecting something different or they didn't understand it. I think it's amazing. I also completely love the relationship between Lucias and Ivy. He's always there when she needs him. She can put her hand out into the dark, and even into danger, and know that he will be there. His quiet, steadfast devotion and her outspoken, spunky and articulate personality are such a delight to watch. Also, I not-so-secretly wish I lived in Covington Woods.

Oh and P.S. the soundtrack is completely and totally gorgeous. I listened to it for about 3 weeks straight and fell in love with it. It's beautiful, except for those jump out of your skin moments, which never fail to make me jump out of my skin.

Juliet didn't wear zit cream...

2009-09-01T22:12:00.000-07:00

So, don't think that I'm not a romantic. I am. Really. Anyone who knows me knows that I treasure all things pertaining to romance, even if they are hopelessly heavy-handed and cheesy. It all still gives me a thrill. However, as I was getting ready for bed tonight, a thought came into my mind that I've had several times before. If a boy that I was in love with made a big romantic gesture and threw pebbles at my window, waking me up for a nighttime surprise, I would consider it the worst thing ever. No make-up, zits everywhere with a healthy dose of zit cream, hair pinned back and raggedy pajamas isn't exactly glamorous. Even if he loved me enough to still think I looked pretty, I would be self conscious enough to ruin the whole experience. I would really be humiliated. I would be especially humiliated if I had been asleep for a while, because this new short hair cut gives me some marvelously cracked out bed-head. Like, little kid bed-head. I'm always astounded when I wake up in the morning to see the new and stunning creation on top of my head. I hope that any boy who knows me well enough to date me would understand this, and NEVER make that romantic gesture so often referred to in plays, movies, books and songs. Never.

This was random. But, I'm exhausted, and sometimes my thoughts don't work too clearly.

That's all (Bah Mariah!)

All Set!

2009-08-29T11:04:00.000-07:00

School starts on monday...wow.

I can't say that I'm ready but at least I'm prepared. My schedule is all set, my room is unpacked, my books have been purchased, my voice lessons have finally been scheduled, and I feel prepared. Whether or not I feel ready is another story. My roommate, Mariah and I attended a film premiere for several short BYU films, and saw many BYU theatre students there. We returned, completely stressed out with the pressures of the program weighing us down, feeling completely un-prepared for the coming semester, major-wise. It's been seriously so fun seeing friends from last year, and playing around Provo with them. Here are some pictures of my most recent adventures, and of my tiny tiny room.

Our new home!! In the Colon(y)

We are SO excited to move in!

Unpacking proves to be a challenge...

When you get the smallest room, and it's smaller than your dorm room from freshman year.

But we have hangers!

Oh well! School here I come!!!!

Merember?

2009-08-29T00:34:00.000-07:00

Remember when school started it was just the start of another school year, not the start of another life? College is weird.

Challenge!

2009-08-25T00:10:00.001-07:00

Okay, so mostly I'm just writing this here on my blog so I'll feel more accountable, and really stick to this challenge. My roommate, Mariah and I have decided to give ourselves a challenge to go without sugar until Thanksgiving. We are going to try and be generally healthy in what we eat, but we really want to see if we can go without sugar. We split a celebratory orange roll tonight for our last hurrah. She being very steadfast and determined will probably do way better than I, who am forgetful and flighty. Hopefully she'll give me a hard time if I cheat or forget! Starting tomorrow! We can do it!

RAMALAMA BANG BANG

2009-08-22T20:40:00.000-07:00

Ok, I know that I've been posting a lot of Youtube videos lately, but hey, it's my blog, and I'll do what I want! So, in case you didn't know, I'm completely obsessed with So You Think You Can Dance. Completely. The finale of this season did several recap dances from former seasons including this GEM! Wade Robson is a choreographic genius. I love him. He's in my top five favorite favorite choreographers on the show (Mia, Sonyah (I love her mohawk), Tabitha & Napoleon, and Tyce)

This song is strange, crazy and completely addictive. Seriously. I downloaded the song, and I cannot stop listening to it.

Enjoy! (well enjoy before Youtube takes it down for breaking copyright laws)

Also, once that beat starts bang banging, I cannot stop myself doing that zombie dance like they do down the stairs...it's really a sight to see.

Old, but fun!

2009-08-21T09:39:00.001-07:00

This is from Coffee House Cabaret my senior year! It was actually my 18th birthday. I collaborated with my friends' band and we gathered up a few others. I think it turned out pretty well. (Besides my awkwardness, and lack of idea what to do with my arms haha)

Amazing.

2009-08-15T18:55:00.000-07:00

This makes me cry every time I watch it. I've never seen a dance where every every movement is so literal and so clear in defining the emotions of the subject portrayed. Every movement makes perfect sense, and it is just heart wrenching and brilliant.

This really is awesome. really.

2009-08-13T12:43:00.000-07:00

http://1000awesomethings.com/2009/08/13/701-when-you-hit-the-point-where-youre-comfortable-farting-around-each-other/

The Laugh Echo

2009-08-09T17:37:00.000-07:00

I'm loathe to post something new on my blog, because that means Ian's amazing post won't be the first thing everyone sees. And I love it. But this is just too good not to share. When I'm feeling down or sad, or bored, I simply watch this baby, and immediately laugh until I cry. Every time. Without fail. I don't know, maybe I'm just immature, but most of my friends seem to love it as much as I do. Hopefully you will too.

WARNING!!!!

This Video causes SEVERE laugh-echo effects. After viewing, you might find it replaying in your head, and have the wild and violent urge to laugh out loud in many inappropriate times and places, such as during a prayer in sacrament meeting, or during a class.

Another post from Guest Blogger, Ian Hansen.

2009-08-01T20:01:00.000-07:00

Heidi L. Smith is currently in sunny California, and I am still in Hamden. For 3 days. Then I head to Provo to get my MTC on. But before I depart, I am pleased to venture into the blogosphere.

I was at first reluctant to accept Heidi's invitation to write on her blog. But slowly, the inviting turned to forceful asking, the forceful asking to threats, the threats to teary-eyed apologies, the apologies to worshipful pleading on bended knee. I finally decided to oblige the poor girl and grace her blog with this appearance.

Actually she just texted me her password and said hey feel like doing a blog? And I was down with the idea. But I like to think Heidi was on bended knee while she texted me.

I thought I might just explain how I came to know Heidi. Seeing as this is her blog, I doubt anyone reading this knows who I am. My name is Ian, and I met Heidi this summer here in Hamden. Actually, I had seen her a thousand times at BYU. I sang in the Men's Chorus this past school year, and Heidi (whom I did not know at the time) came multiple times a week to watch rehearsal. My roommate (also in Men's Chorus) often talked about that cute red haired girl who always sat in the corner. Heidi and I never actually met though.

And then the end of the semester came. I was headed "home" to wait out the long 3.5 months til my mission. I had graduated high school in my hometown, Duluth Minnesota. But my dad had just gotten a new job. So as I headed off for my first year of college, my family headed off to Hamden. I was not looking forward to the summer: working multiple jobs, and having all my friends back in Duluth.

It was in this spirit of downtroddenness (Dictionary.com confirms that this word exists) that I went church that first Sunday. I walked into the chapel, and saw that red haired girl. I thought of doing a Tiger Woods fist pump to celebrate. I didn't. But my mood changed a bit (a lot). I don't think even Heidi knows this next bit: I spent all of sacrament meeting and gospel doctrine thinking about how I would talk to her. I knew, of course, that I couldn't be like "hey I'm Ian you sat in Men's Chorus sometimes and watched us rehearse and me and my roommate thought you were attractive so hey", so I decided to pull the "wow you look familiar" thing, and then gradually let us figure out how I had seen her a million times. So I did just that after Gospel doctrine, slowly allowing the "where have I seen you" conversation to get to rehearsal, knowing full well that that was where I had seen her.

Needless to say, I felt good. But then a mist of wimpyness descended upon me, and did not lift until I finally sent her a very dorky Facebook message asking her on a date. So we ended up going out for ice cream (after our families had dinner together). As I was driving her home from getting ice cream where we had talked until it closed, I said "hey, I don't really feel like taking you home." Heidi said let's go hang on the playground of my old school. So we did. That first night, we talked til 1am on the playground. I had never clicked with someone like I did with Heidi.

For the next 2.5 months or so, Heidi and I hung out every single day. We both had jobs, but we worked around them. We hung out every single day, and I never once got tired of her. When we both had days off, we would hang out all day. When we both worked, we would hang when we were done, til one of us was falling asleep (or my angry mother would call). I'm pretty amazed she was cool with hangin' so much. I don't have the best of personalities. But I'm glad she was cool with it. I benefited so much from it.

You guys all know how awesome Heidi is. I've only known her for 3 or so months, but she is one of my favorite people. I leave on Wednesday to spend the next 2 years in the southern end of Chile. I will miss Heidi a lot. But I am so glad I was able to meet her.

Thanks for an incredible summer, Heidi.

-Ian

P.S. Heidi's password is really embarrassing. Make sure to ask her what it is, she will be thrilled.

Ready and Rarin'

2009-07-25T23:48:00.000-07:00

Since when am I ready for school to start!? I can't wait, it seems so far away, and I just want to get started and into the swing of things. ARGH.

quick status report.

2009-07-17T22:23:00.001-07:00

It's 12:30, I am at the Big Sky Lodge in Rapid Falls, South Dakota. My parents are sleeping. My dad is snoring a little.

This trip has been amazing so far. I am completely falling in love with America. It really is astounding how huge it is, how many places there are, and how different each place is. So many gorgeous thing to see, and fun things to do.

We started drove about 10 hrs the first day and paid a visit to Kirtland, Ohio. Cleveland is a pretty cool city too. We visited the temple, which was kind of weird. It's now owned by the Community of Christ, formerly the RLDS. For a place where so many amazing spiritual things happened, it really almost felt devoid of the Spirit. After we toured there, we went to historic Kirtland, owned by the LDS church. We stepped foot in the visitor's center, were greeted by an earnest missionary couple, and my parents immediately started to cry. The difference was palpable. That tour was so wonderful.

Then we stopped in Chicago. Hot, sticky, sweaty and AMAZING. Maybe my new favorite city. My life was changed when I finally saw, in person, a Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte, by Georges Seurat in the Institute of Art.

Then it was 13 hrs across the gorgeous farmlands of Wisconsin and Minnesota all the way to South Dakota. I spent much of this time conked out, leaning against the cooler that takes up more than half of the back seat which i currently feel like I'm living in. Fun though, I loved it.

Today we toured the Black Hills. The scenery was breathtaking. I think my favorite thing that we've seen so far is the Crazy Horse memorial. I'll write more about that later. We also drove through Custer Park and saw the amazing Mount Rushmore. Then we came back to our little hotel and sat in the hot tub for a much needed relaxer. Tomorrow we leave at 7 to drive to Yellow Stone! Please bless we don't get eaten by bears

I don't know if this made any sense. I'm going to sleep. Goodnight and I love you all! ...whoever reads this blog, and cares anyways haha

Out on the Open Road (For real this time!)

2009-07-12T11:02:00.000-07:00

So now I bid goodbye to the land of green trees, rain and thunderstorms, the best pizza in the country, the ocean, humidity and some of the best people ever. The summer got off to a slow and impatient start for me. I wanted to go back to school immediately. I missed everything I'd left behind in Utah (well maybe not everything...my dorm room comes to mind) and was counting the days until I could leave. The summer turned out to be wonderful. I made new best friends, spent good time with my family, worked a cool job, learned to appreciate New Haven Connecticut, spent time at the beautiful beach, ate the best ice cream, had a wonderful calling, cut all my hair off, and ended up counting the days in trepidation, looking at the time when I would have to leave. Don't get me wrong, I'm really really excited about going on this road trip with my parents, and I'm so excited to go back to BYU and see my best friends and family, and progress in school, but this summer really was a winner (not in the sarcastic sense) it really was wonderful. Of course, much of this is to do with Ian Hansen, a new best friend that I met this summer. I'm very glad I came home this summer, and got to spend this time back here in Connecticut.
and we leave tomorrow at 6 AM!

Peter Pan? Tinkerbell? Whatever, I love it.

2009-07-10T17:10:00.000-07:00

Before!

and...AFTER!

Hair.

2009-07-05T10:06:00.000-07:00

Okay. So, since I chopped my hair senior year, I've realized that I generally look better with short hair. Since last fall, however, I've decided that I desperately want long hair, and have been longing (ha! pun) for it ever since. Now, don't ask me why, but the other day, I got a sudden urge to chop again. This time, though, even shorter. Like really short. Like boy short. Like pixie cut short. This is simultaneously terrifying and exciting. My hair can make or break a day for me. That sounds really shallow, but my hair reflects and influences me (probably more than it should, but oh well). My appointment to get it cut is this Thursday, and I have to admit, I've started to have second thoughts.
This was my original goal, before the chopping urge:

Annnd this is my new goal:

I don't think I'll back out, but I'm still having those nagging second thoughts, especially since my hair is the longest it's been in a couple of years, and happened to look good at church today. Also, cutting my hair that short will condemn me to short hair for at least the next two to three years while it grows out, not to mention some awkward growing out stages. Oh well, I'm still excited! Also, this will be marvelously easy for my road trip.

Guest Blogger

2009-06-27T20:56:00.001-07:00

This week, on The Little Redhaired Girl, we have a guest blogger with us. Ian Hansen, the guitar playing, Men's Chorus singing, politic-loving (very liberal) future missionary of Southern Chile is here with us to share some thoughts...

Thought #1: Bear Grylls is so hot.
Thought #2: That introduction was maybe a 6 out of 10. Don't hit me Heidi. And don't read over my shoulder.
Thought #3: Maybe I should start my own blog.
Thought #4: Nope, too much work.
Thought #5: "I will question Bear Grylls all I want, damn it."-Heidi. Ain't she cute?
Thought #6: Having Heidi explain what denghi is to you, is a real treat. "It's like the worst diarrhea."
*DISCLAIMER: She has never herself experienced denghi. She wished that be made abundantly clear.
Thought #7: Riiiiiiiiight
Thought #8: The Smith basement is nice. The ceiling fan is my favorite part.
Thought #9: If I were Heidi, I would continue doing posts by "guest blogger Ian Hansen." I could get away with super self-congratulatory posts that way.
Thought #10: Eating pad thai takeout on the floor is the thing. Like my dad always said, "Son, when you can sit on the floor with a girl and eat pad thai with her, then you will know."
Thought #11: Progressive Insurance commercials are the worst. That Flo girl with the big name tag makes me feel so angry.
Thought #12: "What commercial doesn't make you angry?" -Heidi. She's a gem.
Thought #13: United Way commercials don't.
Thought #14: Okay seriously, Heidi Smith is the coolest girl I know. This has been an awesome summer. I am so glad I met her. She is going to make a dude very happy y'al
Thought #15: A fun game to play: Take movie titles, or famous quotes, and replace one word with the word "poop". Or another immature word. Example: "The only thing we have to fear is, poop itself." -FDR. Then go get a bowl cut and a Power Rangers backpack. You are now a child.

These are all the thoughts I can think of. Thank you for your time and God Bless America.

Oh What a Day is Today

2009-06-14T11:21:00.000-07:00

I love Ingrid.

Gone Fishin'

2009-06-08T07:29:00.000-07:00

My dad and I, in grand tradition, went fishing last Saturday on the beautiful West Haven, Connecticut shoreline.

While I was in Utah, I really missed the Ocean. I've never been to to Pacific ocean, but the crazy, New England Atlantic ocean and beaches are my favorite. We stopped at the hardcore bait shop that was always stop at, where these two tattooed, pierced, tanned and craggy old fishermen sat, watching "Yours, Mine and Ours" on the TV, commenting on how good of a movie it was. It just goes to show, you really can't judge a book by its cover. We bought a box of sandworms, and a whole bunker.

We got to a cement pier and set up. I think that sand worms are possibly the most wretched creatures on the face of the earth. They look like this:

Ok, lies. That's just how they seems to be to me sometimes. They look more like this.

Still pretty disgusting. I generally let my dad cut those up and put em on the hook for me, but I decided to man up, and do it myself. I, manfully, cut mine in half and, using the back end (the end without the pincher) impaled it, squirming, on the hook, successfully. I was also successful in getting worm blood all over my hand, and giving myself a world class case of the heebie jeebies. But I was proud of my accomplishments. My dad and I proceeded to fish for the next two and a half hours. The wind was really in rare form, and I had full body goosebumps, and couldn't feel the fantastic sunburn I was getting as a result. But look at us! We are fantastic anglers.
This is me and my dad, and our first catch of the day. Nothing much, you know.

This is one of my dad's catches of the day. Not too impressive. He was a little bitter. He was also wearing some fantastic pleated shorts. Oh that fashionista father of mine.

Here is me and my last catch of the day. My dad is not only bitter that my fish is bigger than his, but that my facial hair is much more impressive.

...okay. So we didn't catch anything. But isn't this was fishing is all about? Telling tall tales? Oh well. It was still a really fun daddy/daughter day. After we gave up, we thawed out at a seaside seafood restaurant and had mediocre fish, and I watched my rockin' sunburn develop. Good times.

My Future Part II (Wishful thinking)

2009-06-04T14:14:00.000-07:00

haha. This was the first part of my future plans. beautifully rendered by Ingrid Michaelson. Now we look at the great musical Carousel, by Rodgers and Hammerstein. Oh to marry a fisherman who would drive me around in a boat as we sing a love song duet about our wonderful plans for the future! And though, Billy Bigelow and Julie Jordan (the couple at the front of the boat) are certainly more of an attractive couple, and their relationship is a little more interesting, Carrie and Mr. Snow's is just a little more appealing...and doesn't end in tragedy.

Could only happen to me.

2009-06-02T13:02:00.000-07:00

For those of you who know me, this story is just typical. I've been doing a lot of babysitting jobs, and a few weeks back, I took out some money for tithing and set it on my desk, and forgot about it. A few days later, I couldn't find it anywhere. I had had a couple more jobs since then, so I just put more tithing on the desk with a slip and an envelope. The next day, I was blow drying my hair, and I heard this fluttering paper, turned around, and saw that the blow dryer had blown all the money off the desk. I think it blew the money into another dimension, because all I could find of the tithing was 2 one dollar bills. I looked all around my room, and it's nowhere to be found. I decided that I must have blown the other money away too. It's GONE. I feel like this could only happen to me, with my wonderful talent to lose things.

Thing I love...

2009-05-30T13:39:00.000-07:00

Here is a list of thing I love, especially at the moment:
1. Painting my nails lemon yellow
2. Eating picnic style dinner in front of a movie with my parents. This week it was Chinese food!
3. The smell of Barnes and Noble...and Barnes and Noble in general.
4. New dresses
5. Listening to musicals with my mom. This week it was Carousel and 1776.
6. Doing fake ballet around the kitchen to the Carousel overture (one of my absolute favorite pieces of music of all time)
7. Buying books on CD for the road trip!
8. Planning our stops on the road trip!
9. Anticipation of good things to come
10. Watching movies just for the amazing costumes. This week: BBC's Daniel Deronda
11. Ikea fries/Walking around Ikea, furnishing my future house in my head.
12. Seeing a huge herd of the tiniest baby turkeys follow their mama across my front yard.
13. My sister! Happy Birthday (a day late) G! Love you so so much Schmoopy-Linus!

Choices

2009-05-28T20:07:00.001-07:00

Most of the time
when you scream "I hate you!"
what you mean to scream
is "I love you so much I can't stand it!"

-Dallas Clayton

Out on the Open Road!

2009-05-27T15:52:00.000-07:00

Awesome Thing #757: Taking Your Shoes off on a Long Car Ride.

About 46 days until my amazing road trip! My parents and I will be leaving about the 3rd week in July, and driving across the country, stopping in several amazing places, like The Kirtland Temple, Chicago, Mount Rushmore, and Yellowstone National Park along the way. We'll be stopping in Utah, meeting my sister and brother-in-law, and enjoying my brother's performance in Singing in the Rain (shouldn't he have been born in that era? He was born to wear suits and fedoras), and partying at my sister-in-laws baby shower! Then it'll be off to California with G and Josh, to see some beautiful sights, and eat some amazing food! (Our food adventures are already planned, it's just how my family rolls) I seriously can't wait. My mom and I just stopped at Triple A to get our maps, and our routes planned and stuff. We keep saying "Let's leave now. Can we leave now?" Road trips are one of my favorite things of all time. I've driven across the country to Utah with my parents several times, and loved it every time. Except this time we're going not going to be going through Nebraska or the American Bermuda Triangle, or No-braska as some friends call it. I cannot wait!!!

(I would organize the photos better, but blogger is somehow incompatible with the internet at my house, and they come out as a big mess of internet code, which I find completely indecipherable)

Any takers?

2009-05-26T19:40:00.000-07:00

I'd kinda like to dance and slide around and fall in love in a bowling alley...anyone want to come along?

I also wouldn't object to having that song sung about me...I also wouldn't mind HIM singing it.
I mean, I DO have that same yellow sweater as Lucy!

2009-05-20T19:38:00.000-07:00

Woohoo! It's time for more awesome things from my favorite blog 1000 Awesome Things!

#863 The Perfect Egg Crack
It makes you feel like you actually know how to cook, even when you're just making scrambled eggs, or a brownie mix. It gives you a special edge of "kitchen expertise" even when you really have none.
#860 When the vending machine gives you two things instead of one
After living, almost solely, out of vending machines for an entire school year, this awesome things is extra awesome, though it rarely happens. Also, this one time, on the 2nd floor of the Wilk, next to the Native American Beauty Queen pictures, someone played "Vending Machine Santa" and left a bag of doritos in the bottom of a vending machine. I snagged it before class. That was awesome
#858 The other side of the pillow
The perfect cure to not being able to sleep. Even if it doesn't help you sleep right away, it definitely helps you feel better.
#857 Getting the big corner stall in the public bathroom
I always head for this one first.
#854 Crying
If I'm having a bad day, or if I'm just watching an embarrassing chick flick for the 100th time and crying like clockwork, the minute that he steps out onto the baseball field and "Don't Worry Baby" by the Beach Boys plays (ahem, no movie specifically) it just evens me out, and makes me feel better. Best stress relief there is, in my opinion.
#853 When your microwave pops microwave popcorn perfectly
My love of popcorn should make this self-explanatory.
#852 The smell of the coffee aisle in the grocery store
Oh man. I love the smell of coffee so so much. I think it's one of the best smells in the entire world. I'd add the smell of Dunkin Donuts to this.
#848 Old folks who sit on their porch and wave at you when you walk by
I want to be one of these.
#843 Getting out of the car after a really long trip
Streeeeetch. This makes me excited for my cross-country road trip!
#838 The smell of freshly cut grass
#837 Pushing those little buttons on the soft drink cup lid
I always do this. Always.
#834 Building an amazing couch cushion fort
#833 Pouring a drink where the bubbles go right to the top but not over
#832 Finally having your ears pop back to normal long after a flight or swim
#830 Salt
I think I like salty things more than sweet. I'd way rather have a bag of cheetos than a bag of starbursts.
#829 Smiling and thinking of good friends who are gone
I think the blog was referring to those friends who have died, but I'm thinking more about friends who I'm far away from. I know, it's not the same, but this is my modified Awesome Thing List. Whateva.
#828 Remembering what movie that guy is from
Oh my gosh. THE best feeling. Anyone who know me, knows that when I can't remember this, it drives me absolutely insane.
#813 Museum gift shops
You have to stop in. I mean, where else can you buy commemorative rocks and CDs of cultural music from Native American to Celtic?
#810 Returning to your warm and comfy bed after getting up to pee in the middle of the night
#807 That one really good pen that never gets lost
If it writes really smoothly, you've got a winner. Most of the time it's from a hotel, or a doctor's office, advertising some kind of new medication that you hope isn't for anything embarrassing.
#804 Gym pain
Oh man, knowing that you've worked hard? The. Best. Actual physical evidence of your hard work. Gym pain generally leads me to delusions of fitness, leading me to give myself an extra snack or something. One step forward, two steps back.
#802 Watching something download really fast
Oh my gosh. I would have never thought that someone else would find this as satisfying as I do! I remember when I had dial-up internet (Oh man, I'm such a child of the 21st century... embarrassing) I would wait for hours for a movie trailer to download.

Here are some that I've thought of, myself!
#1 When you hear about something once, and then hear about it several times that day or week.
This happens to me ALL the time! It's so crazy! You have to wonder if it would have happened anyway, and you just wouldn't have noticed, if you hadn't heard about it the first time. This happened to me last week, when on two different medical TV shows, the mystery illness ailing the patients was Familial Mediterranean Fever. I mean, really?
#2 Songs with lyrics that apply directly to you
Even if it's a sad song, maybe especially if it's a sad song. It always makes me feel a little bit better. Well, worse. But I get to have a nice little wallow and pity party for myself when I hear those songs!
#3 Delicious snacks that are ALSO healthy
I am a committed eater of things that are not good for me, but are wonderfully tasty. I'm not a picky eater at all. I'll probably eat anything that's put in front of me, but in terms of snack foods, I tend to go for those things saturated in salt, or glowing with the wonderful magic of artificial cheese. But it's marvelous to find something that I actually eating, that won't kill me by clogging my arteries. Lately it's been edamame heated up in the microwave, and almonds dipped in honey. Delicious!
#4 When you look at the clock, and it's exactly 11:11
Get your wish ready!
#5 The little notification for a new message/email/blog comment
So exciting! The potential! It could be anything! This also makes me a total child of the 21st century again. ugh. gross.

2009-05-16T14:35:00.000-07:00

I loved loved loved this movie. Go see it! I also discovered my parents' secret trekkie past. It was fantastic!

lazy blogging

2009-05-14T21:33:00.000-07:00

ok I know that posting mostly videos isn't really blogging, but I like to share my discoveries. Even if people probably don't watch them. I also am afraid that if I actually blogged I would sound whiny and ungrateful, and I would regret it. My life is absolutely wonderful, sometimes I just get a little bratty, and whiny. So here are videos. Love you all!

Wonderful.

2009-05-14T21:23:00.001-07:00

I missed Youtube while I was living on BYU campus. Needless to say with my jobless solitary life, I have been making up for lost time with good ol' youtube. I have recently completely fallen in love with this song "Run Away With Me" from the musical "The Unauthorized Biography of Samantha Brown." I first heard it at the BYU Senior showcase. The guy who sang it did an amazing job, and I totally loved the song. When I got back I looked it up on youtube, and found a few performances of it. I absolutely loved these two. The actor in me really loved seeing the different interpretations of the song. It's a really good acting piece, as well as being a great song. I think the guy in the first video, Michael Arden acts it amazingly. The momen he snaps into character is so cool to see. He brings this wonderful vulnerability and absolute honesty to the song. This one just blows me away.

The guy in the second video, Aaron Tveit has a great voice, and maybe sings the song a little better, but doesn't act it quite as well. But it's still a great performance.

I

2009-05-13T18:41:00.000-07:00

I love this song, and I love Ingrid. Of course.

I am a lady from Mars
And I can unscrew the stars
I can be anything that I see

I can do anything I want to
I can do anything I want, anything my heart tells me to do

I can be anything that I see
I can do anything I want to

Playing Mommy

2009-05-09T19:36:00.000-07:00

So I've thought for a while that I've thought that I when I have children, I want to have five of them. In the 15th hour of what will be a 16 hour day of babysitting five children...I still want to have five. As the parents don't get home for at least another hour, I have some time to kill. As hard and challenging as today was, it was still fun. Of course living in my own little return college student life with no schedule wasn't really beneficial for my somewhat rusty babysitting skills. I've also never baby sat for this number of children before. I don't think I did a very good job. Their lunch was late, and they didn't really like it, and so they told me they were starving for dinner, which I proudly got to them ontime, and they ate almost none of the huge feast of frozen chicken nuggets and fries that I made. These kids were so fun though. When I first got there, the youngest child, a 15 month-old girl smiled and immediately put out her arms for me, and refused to budge from my side, almost for the rest of the day. On the tour of the house, I was a little shocked to see a somewhat disturbing rubber skeleton doll in the two-year old's bed. The mother explained that this was Fred, and the little girl had felt sorry for him, thinking he must be so cold without skin, and rescued him from the Halloween decorations. Later in the day this same little girl was running around with her shirt around her hips, calling herself a princess. We also spent a good portion of the day hiding under her blanket from differently colored monsters who were coming to eat us. While we were waiting for them to leave, I tried to teach her to give butterfly kisses, and her understanding of it was to kiss me, with her lips, on my eyelashes.
Most of my babysitting experience is with children young enough not to notice when you make mistakes. A 8 month old baby, when you hand her a bowl of applesauce doesn't look disdainfully down at it, and say "Why is this in a baby bowl?" The oldest of the children, noticed all my blunders today, no doubt, but is at the age of discovering tact, or he just didn't care that much. But 6 year old really let me have it. It was seriously so funny. It's a little nervewracking coming into a family situation and trying to understand and recreate daily routines and rituals, like meal times, and bathtimes (oh boy THAT was a fun one, and then it actually did get fun) for the optimum comfort of the children. The kids really did try to help me though. They were sweet about helping me find things. And I got taken advantage of horribly in the dessert, and bedtime department, per tradition for babysitters.
And though trying to get an exhausted, and therefore, at the height of terrible two-ness, two year old to see your point of view and do what you want them to do, while juggling an exhausted, and therefore exceedingly cranky baby, can be really hard. I did it. And I may not have done everythong right, but it was a lesson in patience, and perseverence, and seriously, these kids are just so stinking cute, and so sweet, so even when they were being brats, it was still okay. Today make me excited to have my own little world of chaos someday. Should be a challenge, should be hard and will be wonderful. Today was a day of learning, and growing, and really, I just love kids. It was definitely a test, and while I don't appreciate being slightly taken advantage of my the parents (16 hours, really? They didn't mention that) It was still a good day. Hard, but good. And those are the best kinds of days aren't they? Tomorrow could be one of those days as well. I'm doing Primary Singing time for the first time. Slightly terrifed, but hopeful. Whoo!

Things that make me happy at the moment.

2009-05-09T04:34:00.000-07:00

1. Prayer
2. My bed (more specifically, my amazing mattress)
3. Pickles, and chopping them up and putting them in tuna. YUM!
4. The tarp outside my window. I can go to bed and wake up listening to the rain on it eveyday. It's like waking up inside a tent when it's raining, only a little bit more comfy, because of the aforementioned, amazing mattress.
5. Crying at romance movies (and TV)
6. A new haircut
7. My new ruffledy dress
8. Making money by sitting at home in my PJs and talking on the phone
9. Finding life lessons in the Alice in Wonderland play at the middle school right now
10. Planning possible road trips with my parents

happy, happy, happy!

yes. I stole this from Taza. whateva.

2009-05-08T14:12:00.001-07:00

...It's marvelous.

Make new friends, but keep the old...

2009-05-07T15:47:00.000-07:00

Yep, that's right. I got out my barbies today. Dressed them up. I feel no shame. Is it clear that I am bored enough yet?

Awesome Things

2009-05-05T19:18:00.000-07:00

I don't know if any of your are familiar with this blog 1000 Awesome Things, but this blog, in itself, is awesome.
Here are some of the things on the blog, that I agree are especially awesome:
#995 Finding money you didn’t even know you lost
Oh man, finding a $20 in your old jeans? Best feeling ever.
#992 Being the first table to get called up for the dinner buffet at a wedding
#973 Sleeping in new bed sheets
Glorious. Especially if it's summer time, and the sheets are cool, and especially, especially if you've just shaved your legs.
#966 Living with someone who doesn’t mind killing spiders
Oh man. I've got to find me one of these. My dad is the spider hero of my life back here in CT.
#959 Planning for snoozes
Haha, I set four alarms in the morning, starting at least half an hour before i actually have to get up. It makes no sense really. The BEST thing ever, is when you forget and set your alarm on a weekend, or a day you can sleep late, and you jolt up, thinking you have to be somewhere, and then you can just smile, and lay back down and conk out.
#954 Rain hair
Only good on those rare occasions when it looks like what my friends and I call "movie rain hair," you know the kind. It's the kind that gets you kissed.
#946 The first shower you take after not showering for a really long time
For the people who know me, I am a compulsive shower-er, but on those rare occasions (Pioneer Trek: 1 week, 1st year of girls camp: 1 week) it's close to being the best feeling ever.

#941 The Universal Fry-Sharing Policy
I love french fries. End of story.
#937 The smell of rain on a hot sidewalk
Like summer time.
#933 The first scoop out of a jar of peanut butter
This is amazingly satisfying.
#930 Finally getting a piece of popcorn that’s been stuck in your teeth all day out
When your favorite food is popcorn, this tends to happen alot. and, oh man, it is one of the best feelings ever. Victory dance worthy, even.
#918 When you’re really tired and about to fall asleep and someone throws a blanket on you
Cozy cozy!
#912 Hanging your hand out the window of a car
One of my favorite things to do.
#908 Peeling an orange in one shot
This only happens with those baby, easy-to-peel clementines for me.
#905 Using all the different shampoos and soaps in someone else’s shower
Shampoo buffet, so much fun!
#904 When you manage to squeeze enough toothpaste out for one last brush
Another victory dance.
#901 Flipping through the entire bank of posters at the mall when you need to kill time
#899 The smell of frying onions
For me, this evokes memories of coming home from school, watching Wishbone and Where in the World is Carmen SanDiego? and then coming backupstairs to my parents cooking dinner and listening to NPR.
#896 That feeling you get right after you just vomited
Sweet, sweet relief.
#895 Getting something with actual handwriting on it in the mail
I just love this so much.
#892 Taking your shoes and socks off after a really long day
Barefoot is how I'd like to live.
#886 High fiving babies
#883 Ugly actors
Refreshing. Also Steve Buscemi, enough said.
#878 The smell and sound of a campfire
#876 Taking your bra off after wearing it for hours
Even more sweet, sweet relief.
#870 When you get the milk to cereal ratio just right
#862 The Laugh Echo
When something funny happens, and you remember it later, and laugh out loud again, causing those around you to look at you like you're crazy. The laugh echo happens to me all the time, generally at inappropriate times like, during church, or a test. Nevertheless, still one of my favorite things ever.
Wow there are a lot. So many awesome things. I'll do more later.

Real Friends

2009-05-04T20:29:00.000-07:00

I went the the broadcast of Elder Bednar's CES fireside at the singles branch, and after several technical difficulties, I was able to sit back and marvel at the words of a true apostle of God. The talk was so timely and so necessary to our generation. I really loved hearing it. The talk was about how Satan gains power over our generation by encouraging us to misuse, and minimize the importance of our physical bodies. One of the huge emphases of his talk was the dependance on technology that our generation has, and is gaining more and more. This is something that I see in myself, and am worried about, but don't really take the time to address. I have a huge dependance, if not addiction to the internet, and am slowly gaining a dependance on my cell phone. (Ironically I am blogging about this) Anyways, this has also become more of an issue to me since I've been back home. I've been holed up in my house for most of the time, becoming best friends with our DVR, and watching television shows online. I don't have too many friends back here in CT, and am feeling a little school-sick for the ones back in Utah and that one crazy gal in the Holy Land. It's been a little hard adjusting to my new-old life, and I feel as if I've been leaning on movies and television and books, rather than real life experiences. These characters have become my new friends. Sometimes I seem to care more about Agent Booth and Bones' relationship than having one of my own, I swoon at Nathaniel's glances at Cora in The Last of The Mohicans (really though, wow.) and at Dr. Hunt's three word policy to Christina (seriously that one is amazing, AMAZING) and I laugh at the antics of the Doctors at Sacred Heart hospital, and sigh with a smile at the romantic bickering and happy ending of One Fine Day I can't wait to get a job, and start working on the projects my parents have given me (well, I'm not too thrilled about overhauling our rock path, or cleaning the lawn furniture, but still) It's clear that I need something to do. I miss real people.
On a happier note, I got into the next level of acting class, the improv class! Woohoo! I am on my way! I just need to keep working hard, and I might be able to get into the acting program at the earliest next winter, which would be extremely exciting. SO with that carrot dangling, I will press forward with steadfast faith. I'm mixing my metaphors, but I've been ironing and watching Scrubs all day, what do you expect?